Wednesday, July 1, 2009

BioMom's can but Adoptive Mom's can't???

No, this isn't a's not even a bad joke! It's a double standard and it frustrates the heck-a-mighty out of me!!! BIG TIME!!
Why is ok for a biomom(which I am as well) to be INSANELY frustrated with their kids but Heaven forbid that an ADOPTIVE Mom might be?
Why is it okay for my BIOchild to have traits and idiocincricies that drive me UP THE WALLS but my ADOPTED children aren't allowed to make me crazy?
Why is okay to fuss about the above mentioned tendancies with Biochild and people laugh it off but if I say anything about it with my ADOPTED children I am immediately reminded that not too long I ago I was hysterical b/c she wasn't home. Or in shambles because she didn't want to have anything to do with me?? Get my drift????
Why is this a double standard?? Let's just say it..... ALL THREE OF MY KIDS MAKE ME ABSOLUTELY, UNDENIABLY, UNBELIEVABLY CERTIFIABLE from time to time!!! It's got NOTHING to do with the circumstances in which they became my child. It has nothing to do with how hard I "worked" to get them here (Did I mention that AJ was an IF baby?).
I am HUMAN. I get tired. I have good monents with my kids. I have hard moments with my kids. I laugh with my kids. I laugh at my kids. I scream at my kids. I scream with my kids!
That is life........


Kelli said...

You go girl! Just because they make you crazy, doesn't mean you don't love them. I hate those comments, well so and so would just be happy to have a kid.....yes, and that kid would drive them crazy too! Just makes us appreciate them more in their angelic moments.

Bethany said...

Well said! I get the shouldn't discipline her because of what's she's been through and be grateful you have a child...WHAT?? If I didn't discipline can you imagine what she'd be like???

Anonymous said...

Well...#6 is known as the child who would have been an only child had she been the first....and we still are going through the fight of our lives to keep her. Loving someone means we love them in spite of the fact that they can drive us bonkers not because they are perfect and complete us in every way. I know I cause God a lot of grief and make Him bonkers quite often...but He loves me the same as when I am well-behaved...He just isn't loving my behavior.

Love ya girl!

Kelley said...

I so understand this. The funny thing is sometimes I feel like I should never lose my patience because I wanted a child so badly, but then I remember its only natural to lose your patience. Parenting is HARD sometimes. It doesnt mean you love your child any less.

Carla said...


Smirking Cat said...

There is a similiar attitude about stepmoms. Kids have a knack for driving you crazy, but only a certain privileged few are allowed to socially acceptably admit to this. Nuts on that.